Psalm 109:21-27

Written Mar. 17, 1999

(The fact that I am better is testimony of God's answered prayer!)

(Identifying with Christ in this Psalm )-

Psalm 109:21-27

21 BUT DO THOU FOR ME, O GOD THE LORD, FOR THY NAME'S SAKE: BECAUSE THY MERCY IS GOOD, DELIVER THOU ME.

Yes, Lord, for thy NAME...for thy GLORY, have MERCY on me and help me.

22 FOR I AM POOR AND NEEDY, AND MY HEART IS WOUNDED WITHIN ME.

Yes, Lord, my heart is wounded. I have suffered at the hand of all these physicians! And now this new doctor has me crying. Is she right? Did the other doctors and pharmacist hurt me? Who, Lord, do I believe? Who is right? Can I trust this new doctor? I was near tears while I was talking to her, and when I left, I was in tears! "Money-hungry" doctors with no true compassion....Lord, my heart cries. Have mercy upon this doctor! May I forgive her. But is
she right? Will I be hurt more if I do what she says? All the doctors have hurt me! O Lord, please..YOU be my physician! Give me wisdom, Lord. My honey says to do what she says, so give me grace to not be afraid and to embrace suffering if I must. In Jesus' name. Amen.

23 I AM GONE LIKE THE SHADOW WHEN IT DECLINETH: I AM TOSSED UP AND DOWN AS THE LOCUST

I guess that's a good way to describe how I feel, Lord - declining like a shadow and being tossed back and forth between doctors that make BIG MISTAKES. Give me grace to forgive.

24 MY KNEES ARE WEAK THROUGH FASTING; AND MY FLESH FAILETH OF FATNESS.

Well, the second part is true...I had lost weight, and I AM weak many times, but not through fasting....I take that back. This crazy low calorie diet of meat and low carbohydrate vegetables is a sort of "fast". That's all I can eat without reacting in a bad way.

25 I BECAME ALSO A REPROACH UNTO THEM: WHEN THEY LOOKED UPON ME THEY
SHAKED THEIR HEADS.

Yes, most doctors have shaken their heads. They don't know what to do with me, and my family and friends often don't know what to do with me either.

26 HELP ME, O LORD MY GOD: O SAVE ME ACCORDING TO THY MERCY:

You are my only HOPE, Lord! Have MERCY upon me. And why? The next verse answers the question.

27 THAT THEY MAY KNOW THAT THIS IS THY HAND, THAT THOU, LORD, HAST DONE IT.

Amen! If I get better, it will certainly be YOUR HAND of MERCY. You be my doctor! In Jesus' name. Amen!